What if...

What if your heart is broken so bad that you thought that your heart will never be the same again? Would you blame the person or the incident that did that to you? Or yourself for allowing it to happened to you? Will you be sad or angry? Will you mend your heart by crying and praying or broke people heart to make you feel better?

You see.. these are choices that we have in our life. Either to make yourself a better person or worse when facing a disaster of your life. Some people choose to guard themselves so they will never be hurt again, some people choose not to change anything because the experience worth all the hurting. Who are we to tell which one is right or wrong?

Maybe, just maybe... GOD destined us for better future. That's why he make this disaster happened. Maybe if this isn't happening, we could be worse. I'm sure there's a silver lining in every cloud. This is my choice of handling my sadness. If I'm ever frustrated over anything, I'll promise myself to remember this. I will no resort to blaming others, or even the situation. I'll not blame myself either. I hope I'll be a better person.

I'm ultimately sure that if God wants me to be a mother, I'll be. Maybe not now, but I will. God will let us be. I'll just need to make sure that I'm a better person so that I'll be a better mother than I will now. I'll take this as a test for me. Thank you God for at least giving me the opportunity of hoping.

PS :- This doesn't mean that I miscarried or anything. Simply because I have to wait for another month for trying.